Step 7: Tips for the first date… and the night after

You’ve decided on a first date, he/she said yes...and here come the questions:

  • What to do at the first date?
  • Where to go for the first date?
  • What to talk about at the first date?

Every date is different, but our tips for the first date can help in planning:

The first date should always take place at a public place

Of course you have a good feeling – you already know each other a little from online chatting and have at least the hope that you could fall in love. And still the old online wisdom applies: “On the internet, nobody knows you’re a dog”. In other words, it always may turn out, that the person which whom you have a date, is not the way you imagined. That’s not the end of the world, but if you arrange to meet at a public place, then it defuses a potentially awkward situation.

The first date should be limited in time

The ideal plan includes a meeting of 1 – 2 hours, with an option for extension. So: drink some coffee and then maybe have a walk or a drink, then maybe get something to eat. It’s great when a date develops so positively, that you don’t want to end it, but if it doesn’t work so well, it’s better if you can easily cut it short.

The first date should not be overly original

Some online dating sites try to convince us that nothing is more attractive than originality. That is nonsense! The more original the first date, the greater the risk that something goes wrong, that your counterpart will not like it or that something goes wrong. In theory it sounds like fun, to eat a course at three different restaurants or going to a concert of a band that neither knows . Realistically a first date is already from the beginning plagued by nervousness, awkwardness and embarrassment that you don’t need to add unnecessary disturbances.

Topics and questions for the first date

Here actually, the same rules of thumb apply as with our online dating flirt tips. Ex-partners, sex, politics and religion should be avoided. Also the really big issues like do you want to marry? or do you want children?, don’t have to be talked about on the first date. One should, however, next to comfortable small talk, certainly throw a few questions in the mix, which would reveal if you’re dealing with a person with whom you could imagine a relationship.

Sex at the first date?

On the question of whether to have sex on the first date, opinions vary. Nowadays, it’s definitely not a taboo anymore and if both feel like it, are in the mood and the opportunity spontaneously arises, there’s technically nothing against it. But generally speaking, the more serious your intentions, the longer you should wait.


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